Post by Alice Harris on Feb 19, 2016 18:20:35 GMT -5
"There's nothing so absurd that if you repeat it often enough, people will believe it."
-William James
-William James
Alice shook her head in disgust after reading an online transcription of Rocky Hollywood's latest drivel.
"Once again, he's telling himself and anyone within earshot just how amazing he feels he is... And the more he says it, the more he really believes it... I thought the Jason brothers were bad for doing this... But this... This is a whole new level of self gratification and blowing ones self"
It was the same, no matter the place, no matter the setting, there was always that one constant which bugged her and stalked her - the self proclaimed alpha who really did feel like the world owed them something because their body wasn't big enough for their own ego. Like wrestling's equivalent to the football player Nicklas Bendtner or that dreadful human being Kanye West, there was always that one person who truly believed that they did shit gold, that everything they said or did was absolute truth and any evidence put forward to dispute that belief was met with fierce resistance, even in the face of logic and hard evidence that this indeed was the case.
Lo and behold - Rocky was this example in NAW.
"He still has to resort to that fluke argument when the whole world knows that it was merely a tightly contested match where unfortunately for him, he was unable to finish it off whereas I was... There was no luck there, it was merely one person who had assumed they would win against someone who dug in to ensure they would win... A battle of assumption and reality... And as they say, Assumption is the mother of all fuck ups... And by the looks of it, her child is Rocky Hollywood"
Alice sat there on a half crumbled wall back at the abandoned block where she usually spent her time away from NAW. If you were to look at this scene from an analytical perspective and try to apply some deeper meaning to it, one would say it could be described as an accurate description of Alice's current situation in that everything around her is falling apart piece by piece and being left to decay and she could be next to join the decay. This possible interpretation is not lost on Alice. Looking out across the courtyard area, seeing the grass growing through breaks in the concrete floor she took a deep breath.
"I'm sat here, watching nature run its course, watching how everything, no matter how tall it stands, how impressive or imposing it looks, how enduring it seems... Nature doesn't give a fuck, it waits and eventually it wins. What were once proud walls are now decaying, paint gives way to vines and moss, concrete gives way to grass and trees, the old is replaced by the new... And somehow Rocky seems to think that he is the new... He is here to replace me... He is here to take it all and fellate himself in public even more until we're all sick of it or in some case of Stockholm Syndrome, fall in line with his mantra..."
Slipping herself off the wall and walking across the concrete, Alice looks up at the building in front of her.
"By now, as we draw closer to this title showdown, popular opinion may slowly be shifting towards him. By my own admission, I am the underdog here and I just know for a fact Rocky is going to go on and on about this fact again, but he forgets that the last time we faced one on one, the underdog won... And he couldn't take that... It ate him up inside, it gnawed away at his image, it made him look vulnerable, it made him look weak, it exposed him in that moment for a man who isn't all he bigs himself up to be... It made him look human... And he is, he might tell you he is a God who shits gold and his piss is the solution to the world's energy crisis and reliance on Oil... He will tell you everything he can possibly think of, just so he doesn't have to admit that even those who may have a record like his a prone to off days from time to time, just like every one of us are..."
Walking to the wall, Alice runs her hand across the crumbling paintwork, causing large flakes of it to fall off.
"That night, I scratched the surface and exposed him to reality. I brought him out of his fantasy world and it scared him. It shook him to his core... When I looked him in the eyes last, there were a multitude of emotions there - hate, intensity, disgust... All of which I expected... After all, I represent everything he seems to despise, so it is kind of a given... However, the one thing I did not expect to see was fear...."
As her hand brushes against the wall, it knocks off another section of worn down paint and behind it there are crude childlike drawings on the wall.
"Beneath that tough talking, self promoting exterior is a scared little boy who probably for the first time in his life, came across a woman who wasn't at all taken in by him. He thought he could do what has worked for him in the past - talk to me like a piece of dirt, degrade me, make me feel vulnerable then come in and swoop me off my feet or some macho-bullshit fantasy like that... It might have worked on those fake hair, fake eyelashes and fake titted bitches you claim follow you around the place, but it won't work on me... Saying that I'm an unwashed anus isn't funny... Toilet humour just screams immature and thus proves that you are just a little boy in a man's body... That you might have physically developed into what some people may say is a fine athlete... But mentally... You're just that kid who bullies everyone on the school yard then goes home and pisses the bed because the monster under his bed made a noise..."
Alice laughs at the thought for a moment before she turns round and leans back first against the wall. Looking up at the sky, the midday sun is breaking through the clouds and the birds are flying overhead.
"Tell me Rocky.. Since you say... No.. Since you believe I am so inferior to you, that I am so beneath you... Why did you have to keep attacking me from behind? Why did you have to keep bringing up my sexuality and my personal relationships? Why did you have to keep telling yourself in one breath you were the best and in the next breath constantly saying you lost to me by sheer chance? Is there something I am missing little boy? Is this just your way of trying to get my attention because mommy and daddy were more concerned with other things than you? Was the sneak attacking and calling me an unwashed anus just your way of flirting with me? The constant mentioning of what may or may not have happened between myself and consenting adults outside of the ring your way of saying you're jealous because they were with me? This whole constant claiming that you lost to a lucky pin just a front for the fact you were too infatuated with me to focus on the match?... Scratch that last one... You're incapable of feeling any emotion for any other human being who isn't yourself."
Running her fingers through her hair, Alice flashes a quick glance as the camera catches her for a side profile shot.
"You see me and you feel angry and I think I understand why... I am the personification of everything you cannot have... I am the person who can actually relate to humans whether I want to or not... I am the person who is content with my surroundings and has no need for materialistic gain... I am someone who does not need praise lavished on me every day, merely someone who just demands to be treated as an equal and respected for my athletic ability and nothing else... I am everything you wish you could be deep down, but because you're a slave to your ego, someone who has to constantly tell themselves how incredible they believe they are, you can never be like me... Of course you'll say who would want to be like an unwashed anus? Who would want to be someone who won by fluke?
You'll go on to shout loudly to yourself that you believe you are the best. You'll look at a chessboard and pretend to understand the concept of strategy and tactics in some effort to try and put across your intelligence... You'll do everything I just said and more just so you don't have to face up and accept the fact that you lost on level footing to someone who was better on the night... But most of all, the one thing that you will never admit because it would take the shine off that ego you wave round like a dick in your hands... You're obsessed with me and you cannot stand this..."
You'll go on to shout loudly to yourself that you believe you are the best. You'll look at a chessboard and pretend to understand the concept of strategy and tactics in some effort to try and put across your intelligence... You'll do everything I just said and more just so you don't have to face up and accept the fact that you lost on level footing to someone who was better on the night... But most of all, the one thing that you will never admit because it would take the shine off that ego you wave round like a dick in your hands... You're obsessed with me and you cannot stand this..."
Alice pushes off the wall and walks towards the camera, slowly and deliberately, letting her hips swing a little as she runs her fingers through her hair again.
"In one breath you go on about yourself and then in the next, you constantly go on about me. It really is like you want my attention... It really is like you're doing everything possible just to get me on my own with you... Attacking me from behind, taking team mates out so its just me an you, singling me out and claiming its because I am the Legacy Champion... It's just a ruse isn't it? Your actions say one thing, but your eyes don't lie... Whenever you say my name, I see them brighten a little despite the inevitable rebuttal which will follow when you hear this... You're jealous of Corey Bull because of the unique dynamic me and him share... You made him tap out because you wanted to assert yourself, you wanted to show him that you were the man I deserved.... Well, as touching a gesture as that was... You're too immature for me Rocky... You're also too self absorbed... Do you hones... No, I can't say that, you honestly will believe that you are the best thing to happen to any woman..."
Alice stops just feet away from the camera and reaches down for the knife on her belt. Drawing it, she holds it up and runs her finger along the face of the blade.
"There is one thing I will agree with you on though Rocky... This is checkmate.... But not against me..."
Effortlessly spinning the knife round in her hand without even looking at it, Alice continues to talk, her tone of voice going more serious now.
"You see, it's really simple Rocky... Chess is a game to be played by two. It's easy to get checkmate when you play both sides yourself because you will naturally know how you want your victory to come. I mean right now, we're in the end game stages of this match you started. Your opening gambits of blindsiding me at every possible chance and trying to distract me and break my concentration haven't put me off my game. I may have lost to you in an elimination setting, but the one thing which bugs you, the one thing which you cannot abide and I can see this resentment boiling in you day after day to the point of it manifesting itself as a shit effort to provide some sort of egotistical sexual release is that I defeated you one on one and nothing will change that...
I've watched people like you in other companies. They come in, blowing themselves and hyping themselves up and the first few matches they have do draw some interest, but it's how they handle that first loss which is important... You can often tell how someone is under pressure by the first obstacle which has actually successfully obstructed them.
People like myself, we take a step back and analyse the situation before proceeding, learning from the experience and growing as a person, holding our hands up and admitting we messed up... It took me three attempts to defeat Corey Bull, I used what I had learned in my first two to help me in the final shot. We take our losses and we grow from them. We do not let them define us, but rather enhance us...
You, sadly you are the person who lets a loss define them despite all the self proclamation you keep doing round here. Your insistence that this was a fluke you suffered gives off the impression that all it takes is one golden chance, one split second window of opportunity and that's it, you're done. You don't learn, you don't grow, you remain blissfully ignorant to your reality... Much like the Black Night in the film Monty Python and the Holy Grail... You lose your arms and legs and still believe it to be merely a flesh wound and are adamant that you can beat someone... In the end, all it will take is someone to just shrug their shoulders at you in indifference and just walk away, not even phased in the slightest by your words and mannerisms"
I've watched people like you in other companies. They come in, blowing themselves and hyping themselves up and the first few matches they have do draw some interest, but it's how they handle that first loss which is important... You can often tell how someone is under pressure by the first obstacle which has actually successfully obstructed them.
People like myself, we take a step back and analyse the situation before proceeding, learning from the experience and growing as a person, holding our hands up and admitting we messed up... It took me three attempts to defeat Corey Bull, I used what I had learned in my first two to help me in the final shot. We take our losses and we grow from them. We do not let them define us, but rather enhance us...
You, sadly you are the person who lets a loss define them despite all the self proclamation you keep doing round here. Your insistence that this was a fluke you suffered gives off the impression that all it takes is one golden chance, one split second window of opportunity and that's it, you're done. You don't learn, you don't grow, you remain blissfully ignorant to your reality... Much like the Black Night in the film Monty Python and the Holy Grail... You lose your arms and legs and still believe it to be merely a flesh wound and are adamant that you can beat someone... In the end, all it will take is someone to just shrug their shoulders at you in indifference and just walk away, not even phased in the slightest by your words and mannerisms"
Turning her back on the camera, Alice flicks the knife up before twisting round and throwing it. The camera's mic picks up the thud and as it pans round, it spots the knife sticking out of a wooden door.
"You try to put across the idea that I should be fearful when facing you... I don't think you have quite grasped it yet Rocky... You are nothing to be afraid of... I do have concerns about facing you, I mean you've attacked me from behind, tried to assassinate my character and probably have dirty little thoughts about me which you don't quite understand... But that is not why I am concerned... My concern with facing you is how far are you willing to go, how far are you willing to push yourself only to give me that one shot I need to end your title challenge?
You have already made threats at my career, that shows desperation... Something you'd never admit because that would make you look weak, look vulnerable, look normal...To show that level of desperation just shows how much this has affected you. It just shows that despite all the bravado, the machismo, the self promotion and constantly telling yourself you are something special, you're normal....
Let me tell you something... You're not special Rocky... You're just like me, another carbon based lifeform with a finite lifespan on a rock hurtling through space at some unfathomable speed around a giant ball or burning gas which one day will consume whatever remains of this rock after we have obliterated it as a species...
You're just like everyone else... One day you're going to look yourself in the mirror and wonder where it went wrong... Your career will be in tatters because you went in too hard, you ended a promising star's career and got your ass fired and all what will be left is a broken shell of a man who has nothing left to show for himself as not even the lowest of Indie feds would take him on.
And when it dawns on you, that you're not the best, that you're not special, that you don't shit gold and you're not living in Rocky-land anymore, you'll look back and realise it was all because of a five foot seven, one-thirty one brunette who was at ease with herself and knew that if she carried on the way she always had, she would succeed because success comes to those who work for it."
You have already made threats at my career, that shows desperation... Something you'd never admit because that would make you look weak, look vulnerable, look normal...To show that level of desperation just shows how much this has affected you. It just shows that despite all the bravado, the machismo, the self promotion and constantly telling yourself you are something special, you're normal....
Let me tell you something... You're not special Rocky... You're just like me, another carbon based lifeform with a finite lifespan on a rock hurtling through space at some unfathomable speed around a giant ball or burning gas which one day will consume whatever remains of this rock after we have obliterated it as a species...
You're just like everyone else... One day you're going to look yourself in the mirror and wonder where it went wrong... Your career will be in tatters because you went in too hard, you ended a promising star's career and got your ass fired and all what will be left is a broken shell of a man who has nothing left to show for himself as not even the lowest of Indie feds would take him on.
And when it dawns on you, that you're not the best, that you're not special, that you don't shit gold and you're not living in Rocky-land anymore, you'll look back and realise it was all because of a five foot seven, one-thirty one brunette who was at ease with herself and knew that if she carried on the way she always had, she would succeed because success comes to those who work for it."
Alice pulls the knife out of the door and runs her fingertip along it. Breaking the skin, she lets the crimson liquid form a decent sized blob on her finger before she runs it across her cheek in a horizontal line. 'Putting her war paint on' Alice speaks one last time.
"I accepted the reality that I may not have a long title reign the moment I won the belt... I've taken more punishment in a couple of months here than some guys take in their whole career... I accept the limitations of my physical side, but I do not let them hinder me... You may be bigger and stronger than me, but just ask everyone who has stepped into this ring with me... No matter how hard they hit me, I just keep coming back. Your sneak attacks and constant trying to weaken me might work, they might not... But the damage I needed to do has already been done... Deny it all you want Rocky... But you know that history has a tendency to repeat itself.
You will be your own downfall Rocky and when you're having that existential crisis because the girl who showed no interest in you on a physical level or emotional level whatsoever lands another blow to your ego and exposes you once again for someone who is beatable, I will happily watch as you realise that everything you said was a lie..."
You will be your own downfall Rocky and when you're having that existential crisis because the girl who showed no interest in you on a physical level or emotional level whatsoever lands another blow to your ego and exposes you once again for someone who is beatable, I will happily watch as you realise that everything you said was a lie..."
With the lines of blood drawn on her face and knife in hand, Alice speaks one last time.
"And the best part about watching someone realise they have been living a lie?
That look of utter despair and deflation when all comes crashing down.... See you in the ring Rocky"
That look of utter despair and deflation when all comes crashing down.... See you in the ring Rocky"
With a flash of a wink to the camera, Alice sheathes the knife and turns her back on the camera as it cuts.