Post by Madman on Apr 20, 2013 2:58:19 GMT -5
The scene opens to reveal a nearly empty parking lot sometime approaching sunrise. The light is creeping up past the horizon and the mostly dark outline of a few scattered vehicles is visible. The camera moves closer to one particular vehicle. Even in the low visibility the ugly dull yellowish-almost brown color of the hatchback stands out. The camera person takes a few steps towards the back of the vehicle where the large shadow of a hunched figure is visible. The camera pans to the Madman, Joe Martinez, as he hoists a single large dumbbell repeatedly in his right arm. He sits on the tailgate of his car, a vast array of scattered debris is seen behind as objects stick out of trash bags and lay in scattered piles. The Madman seems to pay no mind to the camera as he hefts the unwieldy item. He stares ahead and is speaking something unintelligible. A camera person clears their throat.
Madman: What? Uh? Oh. Uh. Hey, is it interviewing time?
Unknown male voice: Yeah. It is.
Madman: OK then. I guess I did set this up huh?
The camera bobs in a nodding motion.
Madman: Alright, so what’re the questions and stuff?
Cameraman: So here we are in uh…
Madman: Let’s call it my office.
The Madman continues to hoist the dumbbell as he speaks in a nonchalant manner.
Cameraman: OK, so we’re here in, uh, at? The office of Mr. Martinez as he, I guess prepares for his next big bout. So this time it’s newcomer guidance counselor Craig you’re facing off against. What do you have to say to that?
Madman: Another nobody. I beat the last chump senseless, that twitchy sniveling spaz got what was coming and now it’s time to move on to busting the head of another geek.
Cameraman: Those seem like some pretty confident words there.
Madman: It’s not confidence. It’s fact. Win or lose, the Madman is in his natural element this time around. On the off chance I lose it’s not going to be a pleasant experience for my opponent, this won’t just be systematic decimation, this will be voracious merciless wrathful carnage unleashed on my foe. I've got nothing to fear from this guidance counselor, the only guiding being done will be me guiding his face repeatedly into the turn buckle and me guiding my fists into his face, and me guiding my boot up his-
Cameraman: I think people get the picture. So, you’re saying this Guidance Counselor Craig isn't a guy you think is going to put up a challenge?
Madman: I guess if this was a “prepare a career day” match or something I’d be afraid of him. This however is a hardcore match. This is where I reign supreme. This is where I get to knock Craig down a peg. I've seen very little of him but he seems like he type of guy who sits on his high horse and passes down judgment onto others. If he’s so great how come no one aspires to be a Guidance Counselor? The guy looks like a used car selling dead beat dad, where is the threat in that? Craig is a walking victim, a guy who is just asking for a beating. I’m delivering a first class service to the universe by getting into the ring with this wad of cheap cologne and pseudo intellectualism and mutilating him.
Cameraman: You seem fairly confident.
The Madman halts his routine, still holding the weight, he points at the camera.
Madman: You’re damn right I am. At this point in the game I've shown that I can beat nobodies up non-stop for as long as they come my way. I've been the wall that keeps all these inferiors out of the NWA. It’s been almost a privilege being the gatekeeper here. To be the guy that gets to send all the rejects crying home to wherever they came from by humiliating them in the ring. Craig the only counsel you need is this: give up. Walk away from this fight before I rob you of the ability to walk at all.
The Madman begins to gesticulate more as he talks, he gets up off the tailgate and begins to move towards the camera as he talks.
Madman: Craig it’s mighty unfortunate that your first match is against me. A pug ugly beast with no aspirations other than to beat you senseless. It could have been much easier walking into an exhibition match without the expectation of extreme bodily hazards being present; you may have even stood a chance. Now however it’s a slim grim chance that you’ll be leaving that ring a winner.
With the last word, the dumbbell slides out of the Madman’s hand as he gestures and goes flying straight into the windshield of a nearby car. The loud crash surprises even the Madman himself and he takes off towards his own vehicle. The camera cuts out.
Madman: What? Uh? Oh. Uh. Hey, is it interviewing time?
Unknown male voice: Yeah. It is.
Madman: OK then. I guess I did set this up huh?
The camera bobs in a nodding motion.
Madman: Alright, so what’re the questions and stuff?
Cameraman: So here we are in uh…
Madman: Let’s call it my office.
The Madman continues to hoist the dumbbell as he speaks in a nonchalant manner.
Cameraman: OK, so we’re here in, uh, at? The office of Mr. Martinez as he, I guess prepares for his next big bout. So this time it’s newcomer guidance counselor Craig you’re facing off against. What do you have to say to that?
Madman: Another nobody. I beat the last chump senseless, that twitchy sniveling spaz got what was coming and now it’s time to move on to busting the head of another geek.
Cameraman: Those seem like some pretty confident words there.
Madman: It’s not confidence. It’s fact. Win or lose, the Madman is in his natural element this time around. On the off chance I lose it’s not going to be a pleasant experience for my opponent, this won’t just be systematic decimation, this will be voracious merciless wrathful carnage unleashed on my foe. I've got nothing to fear from this guidance counselor, the only guiding being done will be me guiding his face repeatedly into the turn buckle and me guiding my fists into his face, and me guiding my boot up his-
Cameraman: I think people get the picture. So, you’re saying this Guidance Counselor Craig isn't a guy you think is going to put up a challenge?
Madman: I guess if this was a “prepare a career day” match or something I’d be afraid of him. This however is a hardcore match. This is where I reign supreme. This is where I get to knock Craig down a peg. I've seen very little of him but he seems like he type of guy who sits on his high horse and passes down judgment onto others. If he’s so great how come no one aspires to be a Guidance Counselor? The guy looks like a used car selling dead beat dad, where is the threat in that? Craig is a walking victim, a guy who is just asking for a beating. I’m delivering a first class service to the universe by getting into the ring with this wad of cheap cologne and pseudo intellectualism and mutilating him.
Cameraman: You seem fairly confident.
The Madman halts his routine, still holding the weight, he points at the camera.
Madman: You’re damn right I am. At this point in the game I've shown that I can beat nobodies up non-stop for as long as they come my way. I've been the wall that keeps all these inferiors out of the NWA. It’s been almost a privilege being the gatekeeper here. To be the guy that gets to send all the rejects crying home to wherever they came from by humiliating them in the ring. Craig the only counsel you need is this: give up. Walk away from this fight before I rob you of the ability to walk at all.
The Madman begins to gesticulate more as he talks, he gets up off the tailgate and begins to move towards the camera as he talks.
Madman: Craig it’s mighty unfortunate that your first match is against me. A pug ugly beast with no aspirations other than to beat you senseless. It could have been much easier walking into an exhibition match without the expectation of extreme bodily hazards being present; you may have even stood a chance. Now however it’s a slim grim chance that you’ll be leaving that ring a winner.
With the last word, the dumbbell slides out of the Madman’s hand as he gestures and goes flying straight into the windshield of a nearby car. The loud crash surprises even the Madman himself and he takes off towards his own vehicle. The camera cuts out.